Do It Yourself Deity

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Friends, you can do better than this. The next time you invent a god, I think you could make him a little better. Right now what you’ve really got is a mish-mash of good hopes, sloppy thinking, and left-over theology. Let’s clean this up and invent a god that really works for us. I mean, if we’re going to do this, let’s do it right.

I suppose the other solution, awkward though it may be, would be to discover God rather than inventing him. Maybe "uncover" is a better word than "discover." But this would involve the unfortunate possibility that he might inconvenience us, or worse yet, demand something of us. Just do-it-yourself.

So here’s how I’d invent him:
1) All roads lead to him. I’d invent a God who is so bland he makes boiled tofu seem like chipotle sauce. I mean, let’s make it so absolutely nobody could offend this guy. The ultimate floor-mat. Don’t even put in rules against stuff that seems pretty obvious, this is a slippery-slope, my friends. Once you make even one little rule that comes from God pretty soon you’ll wind up with "commandments" and "commissions" and we’ll have to start wearing long sleeves on really hot days.

2) Make him so that nothing in your current lifestyle needs to change. Get it? I mean, why go around making life difficult for yourself? My assumption needs to be that I am the smartest, profoundest, cleverest person ever born so how could there be any accountability to anyone or anything other than myself? A good mental image of yourself is that you are the apex of the triangle of all human history. Yes, you are the perfect one to judge everything and make all decisions. Consider the absurdity of believing that someone else, perhaps even someone not still alive, could have had a superior thought or deeper insight than you. Yes, you are the best and the brightest so keep on doing what you’re doing.

3) Work this new god of yours into some kind of spiritual club to slake that nagging spiritual thirstiness inside. Get together with a few friends who think just like you do and maybe you can drown out that loneliness of your heart.  The main thing to steer clear of is any kind of outside voice that might give you guidance, just keep believing that your own thoughts and conclusions are as good as you can do. Do NOT consider the possibility that you were created for something bigger than yourself. What could be bigger than you?

Good luck with your project.

Just the right amount of us are here today to change the world, but not our way, not in our time, not by our rules.